Glad you stopped by today folks because have we got a deal for you.
You say you like good news. You say you like to hear about nice things happening to nice people.
Well, step right up sonny, because I’ve got what ya wanna hear.
For starters, howza bout this?
The walker has been put up into the attic! That’s right; no more walker around here. I’m the one walking so look out! Woo Hoo!
I have been using my lovely quad-cane for over a month now. The quad-cane is what the old man, Carl, used in the movie “Up”. Although his cane had tennis balls on it, I haven’t progressed to that point yet. I don’t like having to use the cane but let me tell you, what an improvement on the walker! Plus, I’m able to use the stationary bicycle for my physical therapy again, so look out!
But that’s not the only good news around here lately… We’ve got more!
I am infection-free! That’s right – Kiss me, I’m not infected!
Doesn’t sound as good as Kiss me, I’m Irish. But you gotta work with what you’ve got.
I have been off of the high-dose i.v. antibiotics for over three weeks now and so far, the infection has not returned. Yippee!
That’s great, you say, but you say you still want more??? Well step right up because we have got a full package for you here today. In addition to all of this great news, we have something else; yes, wait – there’s more! My wound has finally closed! Yee Haw! Yes folks, I’ve got a big old beautiful scab right on that wound and that thing is sealed up tight!
Now, how much would you pay for this great news? But wait, there’s more! Act now and we’ll double your offer – that’s right TWICE AS MUCH GOOD NEWS! For three easy payments plus shipping and handling you’ll get good news for me, good news for you, good news for your little dog too.
Now, is anyone interested in a Veg-o-matic? I’m on a roll….
