Things I did this weekend:
- 9 loads of laundry
- 1 trip to the Farmer’s market
- 1 trip to the grocery store
- Put everything back where it belongs, several times
- Dragged out a storage box of old toys because the kids were bored. They were so excited to see their old toys again they forgot about wanting to go to the toy store.
- Got the Halloween costumes ready
- Refilled the birdfeeders
- Watered the garden
- Made two meals from scratch and heated up four others; two meals that the kids actually liked
- Bought 5 new work shirts for Tom, a sweater for me, a dress for Juliana
- Read 3 bedtime stories
- Sliced a pound of grapes in half so no one would choke
- Kissed boo-boos
- Cleaned the junk out of one cabinet
- Tried to keep a good attitude even though the pain from my leg is very difficult
- Took the kids to the library and showed Juliana how to approach a librarian for help with finding a book
- Gave Sam & Juliana each a bath
- Made sure Nick took a shower
- even the dog got a bath
- Read through the measures and filled out my mail-in ballot
- Washed many, many dishes
- Bought two new rose bushes and sweet-talked Tom into planting them
- Cuddled every child, a lot
- Finished my book
- Chased a skunk out of the house, without getting sprayed
- Watched some of my backlog of Tivo-ed shows
- Made happy memories with the kids involving Dairy Queen ice cream
sundaes and lots, but still not enough, napkins
- Paid bills
- Cleaned up several messes that I saw coming but was unable to avert
- Helped with homework
- Drove all over town at least twice
- Sewed up a hole in Nick’s beloved stuffed animal
- Gave my family all the love I could give
This is why I am terrified that someday I might not be here for my family. I do so much, I can’t even think of it all to list it down here. And it’s not enough. I need to be here to take care of them, for as long as they need me. Which is a long time. I’ve worked so hard to give the kids happiness, strength, comfort, guidance and love. I pray every night that I get to stay here to finish this job I’ve started. I’m doing a good job; I just want to see it through.
It's not just the chores - the running around town looking for the right witches broom for Juliana's Halloween costume, or picking up the dry cleaning. Tom could do that. It's the smaller moments, the attention and devotion to each child that they will someday recognize as the love that only a mother can provide. Yes, it's the big picture, the whole tapestry of motherhood that I'd miss, but it's in my prayers I ask for a long life filled with those small moments. In the meantime, well, the meantime is where I live each day, and I'm happy to say that so far, my prayers are being answered.
